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That One Time I Had Kids

Once upon a time I tried to leave the house.

It was going great until I realized I had three kids.

As I was nursing one, the Oldest found a pen and was artistically expressing himself upon the wall surface under the counter bar.  The other was dumping out toys.  I helped Oldest scrub the textured (seriously. swearword.) walls with a magic eraser (hallelujah).  Then Middle potty trainer had to visit said potty.  Awesome.  Then Oldest needed to go too.  Meanwhile Little was crying because he was bored in his carseat and getting too tired to exist quietly.  We grabbed jackets and headed out the door.

I met up with my friends feeling kind of exasperated.  They got there a couple minutes after me.  One said she was late because her youngest was eating bath crayons.  The other had a daughter who poop-exploded down her pants and into her socks and had left footprints all over the house.

After wiping the tears from my hilarity-overcome and empathy-filled eyes, I realized once again that I have found my people.

May your child-lovin day be filled with sweet chaos, lots of patience, and good friends to laugh with about it all.

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